Did I Tell You About The Time I Dislocated My Elbow?

Yesterday morning.

During my thoughtful, planned run on my smartly planned out week that was going swimmingly as I just recently mentioned.  not so swimmingly now.  more like swimmingly in shark infested water.  I think I need to live in a bubble.

Instead of talking about the downside, lets talk about the upside.  because the whole incident is obviously the ‘downside’.  and it’s better to focus on how this little bumpety bump in my running road might not be so bad.  it is so bad.  painful bad.  but for arguments sake let’s say it’s not bad and come up with some good things.  of which they are bountiful.

One bountifully good thing is that I got 6.75 out of my 8 mile run in.  and those 6.75 miles were run at a 7:29 pace.  good for me.  I wasn’t going to run with the watch, but I didn’t have a route and was just doing an out and back and needed to know where to turn around.  once again I was a good girl and did not obsess over the pace.  I actually made a very conscious effort to slow it down for the last 3 miles, of which I only completed 1.75 before the fall.

Here’s how it went down.  literally down.  to the ground.  I think I was booby trapped.  that’s what it felt like – I was running on a very Main St part of Main St with a very decent amount of morning traffic.  Cruising along and feeling so happy to be alive and running and taking it easy, and before I knew it, I had kicked up this metal ring thing that was on the side of the road with my left foot.  Being oh so talented, I managed to get it flipped up and caught on my right heal, creating a sort of lasso effect and propelling me forward.  all in seconds.  didn’t even know what was happening.  until I was on the ground.  for all to see.  hands out.  my right arm extended, took the entire force of the fall.  which is interesting because my left hand is cut up.  nothing on my right.

don’t worry mom.  I hydrogen peroxided the heck out of that asap.  no flesh eating bacteria happening over here.

Nothing really hurt too bad immediately after. I was just going to walk the 1.5 miles home.  But thank goodness for neighbors that are on their way to work and witness the entire circus act go down.  She turned around and offered me a ride home.  there are good people out there.  within an hour of getting home and being pissy about the whole stupid thing, I could not move my right arm.  trying to chalk it up to the fact that it just took the brunt of a 138lb running person fall and that it would be sore, but it felt like something was wrong.  I got in to see the orthopedist.

He said judging by the x-ray and my movement or lack thereof, I dislocated it and relocated it.  dislocated when I hit and popped it back in place probably when I got up.  good news.  I didn’t break it in 37 places like I thought and felt.  and I didn’t need emergency surgery like I was sure I would need.  and he said I could go finish my run.  I kid.  I did ask if I could run today.  he laughed.  I said I’m not really kidding, but I get it.

Here are some more bountifully good and exciting things that an incident like this bring about in my comical life.

1.   I got to sport around this lovely new accessory for the day.  I’ve always wanted one of these sexy little black slings.  just what I’ve been missing in my wardrobe.

ouch

2.  Along with that, I was kind of forced to wear my ever loving red Target sweatshirt all day.  comfy clothes all day.  I could not move my arm enough to get it off.  ok by me.  not really.  even I was getting nauseated by the stink.

3.  Plethora of homemade little gifts and ‘books’ from my thoughtful children just steal my heart and bring sunshine into my life.  within about 5 minutes of walking in the door all beat up, I had about 18 “I love you mom”, “you are the best” books from the girls.  here’s just a sampling:

I AM the ‘spashest’ mom.  I fall a lot.  that would be pronounced ‘spesh – a – lest’, or spelled ‘specialis’ to you non kindergartners.

I am also ‘sweet’ and ‘fun’.  very good to know I have some redeeming qualities.

4.  My husband is also a very thoughtful gift giver.  always thinking of me, even when he goes for a run…bringing back my nemesis…someone was out to get me

figure that one out.  I’m really not sure.  all I know is that it took me down.

5.  Hello Kitty bandaids really do make all of the world’s troubles go away.  no wonder my girls practically throw themselves off their bikes in hopes of an injury.  they want hello kitty.  my little loves, haven’t you learned I hand out bandaids like they are candy.  you don’t need to hurt yourselves.  a simple hangnail will suffice as reason for a bandaid.

6.  I had the best iced coffee I have ever made yesterday.  that has nothing to do with anything, except that it made my day brighter and you have to take note of the little things during the day that make it better.  the coffee made it better.  so much better that I had two large iced coffees.  that’s a real treat.  you never know with iced coffee how it’s going to be until you take the first sip.  this was utterly delightful.

7.  Painkillers.  they do work.  but they also make a mama sleepy.  so I was thinking if I double up on the coffee and have a diet coke I will be all jazzed up on caffeine and the pain killers won’t knock me out.  either that or the combo of caffeine and hydrocodone will kill me.  it was a risk.

8.  An unfortunate circumstance that puts the mom in an unpleasant condition is certainly means for a little lululemon sympathy shopping.  ok.  if I must.  I’ve been eyeing this jacket.  in finally went on ‘we made too much’.  score.  my lucky day.

and if you want a view that doesn’t involve a fingerprinted, stickered mirror so you can actually see the jacket, here you go.

9.  A nice morning breakfast with my girlies at the coffee shop.  always makes life smiley.  and sunshiny.  hubs took the 4:30am riser on a hike today.  and out of my hair for the better part of the day.  is it Christmas???

10.  I have gained much knowledge about the elbow.

nice looking elbow if I do say so myself.

knowledge is always a good thing people.  I now know about sail sites, and fat pads.  This is what Dr. Orthopedist says (actually the PA, but whatever): ‘Well, if you look here, you can see the fat pads clearly around your olecranon are very visible and enlarged…..’  Oh my, dr. orthopedist. talking about my fat pads in such a manner and we’ve only just met.  lets slow this relationship down please.  apparently fat pads are only visible if you’ve done some silly thing like trip on your run and dislocate your elbow. or something like that.  normal thing to do.  now I know about my fat pads.  good stuff.

11.  Not so much a good thing, but a thing.  a learning thing.  I’m directed not to run until at least next week.  bye bye long saturday run:(  see you next week.  I could run.  my arm is pretty sore, but not in the running position.  😉  BUT, docs orders are not to.  and I am learning to listen.  no running.  that’s funny.  I was just ‘not running’ for quite some time.  what’s another little break.  no one said anything about stepping.  hello stairmaster.  with my one functioning arm.

12.  In all of this, I realized when I got home, that my legs, particularly my right one, feel completely and utterly 100% fantastic!!!  This is the first time I have been able to say that in over 2 months.  not a single, slightest twinge of anything funky or ‘off’ or tight or uncomfortable.  shins are great.  so happy.  now if I can just learn how to run on pavement without killing myself, we should be good.

13.  A very helpful husband that got the fam through the day is something to be thankful for.  a one armed mother makes the activities of daily momming and driving and waiting on everyone hand and foot and such impossible.  too bad for me.  I had to sit and direct the hubs around all day.  actually not a bad gig.  I rather enjoyed myself.  icing and ‘healing’ whilst he tends to the kidlings and their many needs.  thank you hubs.  lets do this again next week.  I’m sure I could find something to trip over and break my hand or something very inconvenient but not debilitating.

14.  And that’s just what this is.  super inconvenient.  super frustrating.  kind of super funny.  we laughed a lot about it yesterday.  it’s life.  and things totally jump out at you on the road when you don’t expect them.  literally.  and metaphorically.  and they throw a little wrench in your seemingly perfect week, month, year, life.  and life goes on and you keep doing your best not to fall flat on your face too often.  and you do your best to learn what the point of that ‘thing’ was.  and to not get too beat up over it.  because there will certainly be more ‘things’ that come up and it ALL makes a part of your story and your journey on the way to whatever it is that is your purpose in life.  so as soon as I started getting a tad dramatic about this silly little inconvenience right after it happened, waiting to hear the worst and picturing my arms getting all emaciated and losing all strength because I surely would never be able to lift a weight again after this tragedy, and then taking more time off of running on top of it all – I think, it really doesn’t matter in the grand scheme.  this is a tiny example, but after you let your head drag in misery for a bit, pick it up and find SOMETHING good and try to find the big picture, or the new picture.  that is all.  then go shopping and buy yourself a pity present and really move on.

Have you ever dislocated anything?  Broken anything?

Have you ever fallen flat on your face when you are running with lots of people watching?  embarassing.

And….who’s racing this weekend?!?!?  And….happy memorial day weekend!  Fun plans?  Tell me about them!